Prioritize. One thing that I guess I will never learn, although the least that I can do is try to learn from all the terrible things that had happened from my lack of ability to do just that. Prioritize comes right after decision-making on the list of things (or skills, if you really can call it that) that I have always failed to acquire. No matter how hard I try.

It always goes back to my inability to recognize between things that I really need and things that I really want in my life. But then again, who the fuck can really tell the difference between ‘want’ and ‘need’? I can’t... Like right now, I know that I need to find a better job because I don’t see future at the current company that I work for. But at the same time, I want to do something else with my life other than things that I have been doing all these while...

I wish I know how to prioritize in my daily life. Just like each time when I want to go out with my friends oh-so-badly but at the same time, I know that I need to be at work or somewhere else more important. Or last weekend when I want to simply grab this Calvin Klein t-shirt by the price tag but at the same time I need to use my remaining salary to pay for some bills. Well I did get that Calvin Klein t-shirt and I have to say that I have no regret whatsoever. The bills can wait right?

So I am terrible at prioritizing my life and I failed miserably in having my mind made up each time my life requires me to do so. I have to learn how to say ‘no’ and I guess that’s what this is all about, to be able to say ‘no’. The way that Sharina refused to be part of our small get together each time she ran out of cash or simply because she needed to attend to other things that might be more important to her. That is one rationality that I wish I had because yours truly over here on the other hand, can’t never say no to any invitation that involves friends, food, cigarettes or shopping malls. Even if I have only 10 bucks left in my wallet, I will definitely be there without any hesitation.

I guess I’ll just never learn..